“Each of us must confront our own fears, must come face to face with them. How we handle our fears will determine where we go with the rest of our lives. To experience adventure or be limited by it.” -Judy Blume
Fear exists to keep us safe. It is not good or bad. It just is.
However, fear interferes with our happiness so it is important that we work towards utilizing and overcoming it.
When I chose to leave my unhealthy marriage, sell nearly all of my possessions, pull my daughters out of school, and set off on an adventure around the world, I was terrified.
What if I fail?
What if people judge me?
What if something happens to us?
What if I run out of money?
I could go on and on about all the fears I had but I still chose to DO it because the fear of NOT doing it was far greater.
I did not want to live with regret.
In order to overcome fear in life, let’s first define what fear is.
According to the verywellmind, “Fear is a natural, powerful, and primitive human emotion. It involves a universal biochemical response as well as a high individual emotional response. Fear alerts us to the presence of danger or the threat of harm, whether that danger is physical or psychological.”
Here are 7 ways you can overcome fear in life:
1. Build Your Tribe Wisely
Peer pressure can actually be a good thing when done in the right way. This is why I choose to surround myself with positive people who challenge me. They understand my goals and encourage me when I am playing small due to fear and need an extra push.
Do you have people in your life who you can talk to about your fears who will encourage and help you push past them?
If not, then it is time for you to seek out those people. You can do this both in person and online. Build connections with others who will help you overcome fears and encourage you along the way. This is what we have done with the SMD Academy & Inner Circle Member’s Club. The Inner Circle Mommas help each other push past fears.
2. Write It Out
What is the absolute worst case scenario for the fear or fears you are currently facing?
My worst case scenarios were that my kids and I would hate traveling, I would have to go back to Austin and start all over again, and I’d fail at starting my own online business.
You have your own worst case scenario. Write it out.
Often our minds make things a whole lot worse than they actually are and writing it out can help you not only get clear but also realize that it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
3. Visualization Is Key
Visualize your end goal. This will help you stay on track and not let fear overcome you. Visualize that life of freedom. Visualize having more time with your kids and doing work you love. Athletes do this all the time. They visualize every move and them winning in the end. You CAN DO this too!
When I used to fear taking off for full-time travel, I would envision a slow simple life with my kids where I didn’t have to work all the time. I have now created that life.
I am terrified of planes so every time I get on one, I envision myself safely at my destination. This is powerful and it can help ease your worries.
4. Don’t Reinvent The Wheel
A lot of fear comes from the unknown. You want to quit your job and travel the world but you are terrified of all the unknowns. Chances are high that what you want to do has already been done. Seek out the stories of those who have already done what you are wanting to do. There are tons of free resources out there as well as coaches, courses, books, and so much more.
You can learn from those who have already done it. You do not have to reinvent the wheel.
5. Learn From Babies
Have you ever watched a baby learn to walk? It is absolutely fascinating because they are so fearless. It doesn’t matter how many times they fall down, they try again. Imagine if us adults had that same determination to overcome fear.
What if babies gave up after they fall down the first time? We would have a bunch of adults who couldn’t walk.
I absolutely love learning from my youngest daughter. She is absolutely fearless and often inspires me to overcome my own fears. I remember when we were in Playa Del Carmen, Mexico at a resort. My youngest kept running into the water despite not knowing how to swim. She would be smiling under the water as I picked her up nearly having a heart attack each time. She did not care. She looked so free in the water and did not fear it at all.
We can learn a lot from little ones when it comes to overcoming our own fears.
6. Act As If
You need to fake it until you make it and act as if you are not scared. I get that this might sound crazy but it works. One of the best things you can do to overcome fear is to act like you are not scared.
Fear can be crippling if you let it so why not act like you are not scared? To this day, going live scares me but it is an important part of my business so I act like I am not afraid and go live anyways. Typically, as the live goes on, I feel less and less scared.
Confidence defeats fear so act confident and watch how quickly you overcome your fears.
7. It Is All About The End Game
By keeping your overall outcome/goal in mind, you are better able to overcome fear. So instead of focusing on all the things that can go wrong, think about all the things that can go right.
You can quit the job you hate and create a job you love.
You can end that toxic relationship and find someone who loves and appreciates you.
The end game is a powerful motivator in overcoming fear so focus on the outcome in a positive light.
You Are Not Alone
We all have experienced fear in our own lives but not all of us see how fear can actually be an opportunity. Imagine shifting your mindset and seeing fear as a positive and not a negative thing.
I often tell people to seek discomfort because that is where real growth happens. If your dreams don’t scare you, they are not big enough so make sure they scare you just a bit.
If you want to overcome fear in life, you just have to start. Quit the job, end the relationship, buy the plane ticket, start the business. You’ve got this!
Let me know something you fear in the comments.